Saying Goodbye to our Summer Girl...

A good friend of mine (Court from the Mpls) grew up with what she called "Summer Girls" nannying for her. Her parents lined up said summer girl to take care of her and explore and seek new adventures. She became very close with her summer girl over the years and is still friends with her to this day. In fact, they are the best of friends. This is how I envision my girls growing up with their Summer Girl, Nanny Natalie (as they call her, Natty).

When my VP at work referred me to her friends' daughter as a summer nanny I called her within minutes of receiving her phone number. I heard this young lady was responsible, hard working and fun loving. I was able to meet and interview Natalie this past Spring and knew she immediately had the qualities we were looking for in a nanny; adventurous, enthusiastic (she was a cheerleader, girl after my own heart) and extremely responsible. I hired her within days. And then we waited for the summer to roll around.

The girls left school and began their summer with Natty. As the days and weeks went on, the activities and explorations were new and fun and the threesome we left at home each day fell into an amazing summer routine. Pools, parks, museum, zoo, fairs, feeding ducks, tie dying, the list goes on and on. Early on Natalie introduced the girls to her parents and the girls would rave about how much they loved Natty's mom and dad (Granny Panties and Mr. Dave respectfully). I was more than thrilled that Natalie had parents that loved my girls and welcomed them into their lives (office visits, lunch dates, garage saling, playing with Natty's childhood toys at their house). Felt like the girls had a new set of grandparents to love on them.

Over the course of the summer we could see new "Natty-isms" in our girls; they learned how to say "IU" with the coordinating arm movements, whenever they smell a dirty diaper they now say "PU Purdue!", they have many new facial expressions including the "attitude" face and they also can sing almost every song on the pop / top 40 radio stations. The three girls spent so much time together and fell so much in love that it seemed as if Natalie had been a part of our lives for much longer than 3 months. And we knew saying goodbye to her would be difficult.

 Attitude face (this is now as popular in our house as the excited face used to be):

 Another lunch date with Granny Panties (Miss Kay) & Mr. Dave. Love.

 Picking blueberries

Natalie's last week went out with a bang: a huge trip to the Fair with her mom, the girls' first manicure among all their normal shenanigans. Natty's last day she shared with us a 30 minute video of the 400-ish photos and many home videos she captured over the summer. I was laughing and crying...and so was Natalie. The video meant so much to me...and was so touching that she took the time every day to capture their moments. And then to turn those moments into an amazing montage for Mike and I to watch (and the girls to relive). The goodbye was bittersweet; we had an amazing time with her all summer but we know we'll see her again. Real soon. We plan to visit Natalie down at IU and we know she'll be back often to visit her parents. The goodbye was just a "see you later" in my opinion. We will miss her dearly, but the girls are excited to get back to their buddies at school and this is a big year for Natalie at school too (she turns 21 this year!!!). Good times ahead.

Thank you, Natalie, for a summer better than we all could have imagined. Thank you for loving our girls and welcoming them into your own family. You far surpassed our expectations and we were so fortunate to have found you! Best of luck at IU and we'll see you sooooon! xoxo

Summer Vacation 2011...

My summer vacation started last weekend...with a Saturday morning long run with 6 other women. Last summer when I was marathon training I was running with Meggie. Just she and I at 6am alone on the Monon week after week. Pushing each other. This summer, we have gathered a group of women that run together each Saturday morning training for different marathons. Our duo turned into a group. How cool is that?! I have found all these amazing women that start planning for their weekend long runs on Monday. Talk about ladies after my own heart. Yes. Please. Here we are bright and early:

 Once I got home from the run we packed the car up and headed north for Lake Tippy for 7 glorious, relaxing nights. And I did not pack a blow dryer. Now that's a vacation!

We hadn't taken a vacation since Florida Spring Break and we were more than ready to get away to the lake. We had several families that were going to come stay with us, but all-in-all we had 3 nights alone and 4 nights with guests. Was the perfect mix to our vacation.

The cottage we rent belongs to our dear friends the Tynans and they were more than generous throughout our stay at the lake. We entered the cottage to find my all time favorite lake treat: bagels, cream cheese, homemade pesto and fresh tomatoes. Oh my, does Nancy know me or what?! They also let us borrow a ton of toys for the girls to play with, a pack-n-play, their tube and their boat. Their boat. How generous are they? To know them is to love them, that's for sure.

Our first guests were Mike's mom Cathy and Larry. The girls did some serious swimming with them:

 After his parents left, several of our friends showed up:

 The Morses and the Fechtmans arrived on Sunday afternoon and we didn't waste any time...bathing suits were on before bags were put into rooms. We know better than to mess around at the lake. When the sun is up - we are outside, on the water. Boat rides, swimming, jet skiing and tubing were in our imminent future.

 You could tell Sandi is an amazing stay at home mom (who works the night shift as a nurse!), as she whipped out crafts every time we turned around. If it wasn't making a tree imprint with crayons, it was painting or making jewelry. Talk about keeping the kids occupied!

 And it isn't lake living if you don't bathe in the lake...

 Matt & Jill (Matt grew up in California, on the coast, surfing. Lake living was out of his vocabulary but I'm pretty sure we've turned him on to it.)

 Tubing!!!

 Sunday night was a riot: listening to the big kids in the dorm room of 4 twin beds trying to fall asleep. Again, this is a rite of passage of lake life...sharing a room with a bunch of your best buddies singing, talking, laughing. It was so much fun to listen to. We adults stayed up late chatting and by midnight the boys were on a boat ride that lasted late into the night. Good times with great friends. And making memories along the way. Wouldn' have it any other way.

 There was a watermelon eating contest (Ben won)

 Water balloons...

 Everyone left on Tuesday, which left a few days to ourselves before more guests arrived. Fortunately, the weather turned and the humidity left us (which made for some very cool & comfortable runs in the country for me). We turned the a/c off and opened all the windows. Decided the mornings were too cold to swim so we set off for Shi.pshewana's notorious flea market. Land of the Amish. Yet everything sold there is made in China. Go figure. The girls loved the new environment and adventure:

 We bought a rainbow of nail polishes for Izzy, jibbits for their crocs, a princess ring for Mizz Iz and some fresh produce.

And then some more swimming and boat time

 

 The view from our deck

 Thursday we were invited to go turtle hunting with Big Joe & Aunt Nance...

 Mike caught a little turtle whom we named Yertle the Turtle and one large-ish turtle whom Iz called Yertle's mommy.

 Nance & Big Joe have been turtle hunting for years. Years. And tradition is we catch them, take them home for a night or two, leave them in a cooler/bucket over night with a rock to rest on and leaf to nibble on, then we return them to where we found them to go back to their homes (so they don't have to come home with us!). Simple, right? Well, we woke up the next morning and discovered Yertle wasn't in the cooler. Or anywhere on the deck. Seems as if an animal must have taken him as a snack during night. We told the girls Yertle went home to be with his parents, that he missed them. Izzy cried. I cried. Then I immediately called Nancy. She laughed. Then realized there were kids involved and said, "Oh dear! This has never happened to us, ever!" So we had that to deal with. RIP Yertle.

 Mike's dad and Laura arrived on Thursday just in time for dinner and an evening boat ride...

 Bob brought his fishing gear and he, Mike and Iz fished for a while on Friday morning. Izzy actually is very good at casting off...she has quite the natural arm!

 Morning boat ride snuggle

 We swam at least twice a day, which allowed plenty of time for Izzy and Mike to learn new circus tricks:

 Do some serious Izzy tossing...

 And relaxing during naptime. This was my FAVORITE time of vacation, as I would grab my book and the monitor to spend 2-3 hours in the sun!

 This might be one of my favorite pics...Izzy is always asking to take pictures and this is one of her shots:

 By the end of the week Izzy became brave enough to jump into the lake without any help. And would submerge herself under the water. Big time. She's kind of a big kid now.

 And she's proud. We are, too!

 Self timer at its best:

We had an amazingly relaxing and fun vacation. Thanks to the Tynans for their generosity and our friends and family that were able to join us to compound our enjoyment!

Package...

I received a package in the mail today. I saw it was from a company I just ordered a wedding gift from so I didn't open it right away. As I was moving the box I realized it was much heavier than I thought...my curiousity got the best of me so I opened it. And my heart was torn from my chest when I saw this:

 A memorial stone for the Bax and the sweetest message that opened the flood gates once again:

 I know in my heart that Baxter had an amazing 2 years with his adoptive family...and that he was loved more than even I could love him. Their thinking of me while going through their own grief has blown me away. I seriously couldn't have asked for a happier ending to his life.

 Remembering how I dressed him up every year for the Bulldog Beauty contest at B.utler

 And how he let Izzy climb all over him

And his love for swimming. Bet you'll never meet another bulldog that can run several miles then get into water and swim all day. He was one special dog and he brought more joy to me than I ever thought a pet could give. Love you, bub....lots of people loved you, you were one special bully!

R.I.P. Baxter...

For those of you that knew Baxter (and even if you didn't I suppose) this email will be a tear jerker & is quite long. Consider yourselves warned, especially if you're a dog lover.

See, I never was a dog person. Ever. It was always cats that I owned. Until Baxter. It wasn't my idea to get a dog. But I went with it. It was a very lonely time in my life and I was grasping for anything to rescue me. And Baxter was it.

When I was most sad and lonely in my adult life, Baxter entered my life. We played together, slept together, ran miles together and even cried together. Believe it or not, he was my rock during some dark hours. Let's just say Baxter was the only thing I wanted from my failed relationship. The other guy kept the couches. I kept the dog. He was all I wanted (the dog that is, not the guy).

So we started our new life together and almost immediately Mikey and Katie dog entered the picture. Baxter now had to share me. But I still loved on him. We still walked, played, cuddled. Fast forward through years of infertility and we now have a toddler that climbed all over Bax and a baby on the way. Our house was quickly becoming crowded and Baxter's needs were becoming greater than what we could provide him. The day finally came to find him a new home. You may remember this sad day.

I asked for no correspondence. I didn't want to know if his new family wasn't working out. Or worse, if they fell in love with him. My heart simply couldn't take any news, good or bad. I received one email a week after Bax left saying he was living the dream: long walks, lots of snuggling and tugging and so much love. That was all I needed.

Over the years I have often wondered how he was doing and if he was still alive (Bullies don't have a long life span and he was born in 2001). Friends and family have inquired about him. But I had no answers...only hoping he was happy and loved.

I found out today that he was exactly that. Here is the email I received from his adopted family:

"With an extremely heavy heart, I wanted to let you know that Baxter passed away very peacefully yesterday evening. I thought you would want to know.

Last week, Baxter started to develop a very runny nose and it seemed as though he had something upper respiratory going on. He also developed a knot on his forehead above his left eye. I took him to the vet on Thursday and it wasn't good news. The knot was a tumor in his skull that was also going into his sinuses, hence the congestion. We talked about our options, and with Baxter's age, we thought that pain management would be the best route. We left the vet with various medicines to keep him comfortable and pain free, thinking that we would have 2 weeks to 2 months of time to give him the happiest time possible.

By Saturday, Brandon and I knew that we didn't have that much time left with him. Baxter began to have a red tint to his runny nose from the tumor invading the sinuses, his breathing became more labored, and you could tell that he was ready to go. That Baxter spark was gone and he was spending a great deal of time trying to console me rather than the other way around. The last thing we wanted was to let him suffer because of our own selfish needs and our not wanting to let him go when he was so ready.

On Monday evening, the vet graciously came to our home and helped us to let him go. Know that it was very peaceful and quick. He stretched out on his bed with his head in my hands. We told him how much we loved him and what a good boy he was and he then he fell asleep very quickly. The doctor said that as quickly as he let go, that he was more than ready and that he probably would have gone on his own in a matter of days.

I want you to know that Baxter's last few days were very happy and very comfortable. He wasn't alone, ever, and enjoyed constant belly rubs and ear scratches. We slept with him in our bed every night. I switched him to a soft food immediately so chewing wouldn't be painful for him. He absolutely loved the soft food. Popcorn was his favorite bedtime snack so we enjoyed a lot of that together. Baxter and I went for a long car ride on Sunday - he loved car rides in the front seat where he could watch all of the cars. On Monday, I made a steak for him for his last dinner and that made him very happy.

We buried Baxter in our backyard where his favorite place to nap in the sun is with his bed, blanky, and of course, his woobie. I want you to know that he was so greatly loved here and ridiculously spoiled. Even though we only had a few years with him, we will miss him so much. It seems as though he had always been a part of our family and there is a huge hole in his spot."

I read the email over and over again through streaming tears. My cup runneth over with the evident love he was given over the years and in his final hours. How fortunate Baxter was to be so loved, so spoiled, so happy. I'm forever grateful for this family that has opened their home and their heart to a dog that meant so much to me. I couldn't have asked for anything more.

 

Maybe all these tears mean I'm a dog lover after all.

Never Grow Up...

The summer is going by so quickly. Too quickly. We are spending many hours outside but recluse back into the air conditioning when it gets too much to bear. I've been waking before 5am several times a week to beat this heat and get my runs in before the sun rises. But even those mornings I come home drenched, wringing out my clothes. Ran with Meggie and 5 others yesterday and you can read about our long run here.

Another reason I run so early in the morning is I want to be able to spend every waking moment with my girls. I know this time in their lives will go by quickly, so I make it a point to be ever-so-present in their lives when I'm home (part of that is the working mom's guilt in me). I realize some may think this is overbearing, but it's how I choose to live my life. I want to remember having tea parties and tickle fights and dance parties. Always.

Our nanny's time with us is quickly coming to an end and boy, will we ever miss her. She made a cd for us of songs she and the girls have been listening to all summer. I popped it in the car the other night and the girls were bouncing in their car seats, singing every song, making Mike and I laugh hysterically. Mike even commented, "This is a sign the girls need to go back to school!" Are they learning much this summer? Not unless you call knowing the words to songs by Ke$.ha and LMFAO (ps-Mike didn't know what that stood for, and if you don't...that's totally fine imo). The girls have been experiencing so much that they wouldn't normally get do: museum, zoo, county fairs, outdoor concerts, library, splash parks, pool, Monkey J.oe's, berry picking...I could go on. But like I said, not so much learning, but experiencing. Love that our nanny has been so creative and adventurous. Izzy & Laney have many years to learn, right?

Back to the cd that the nanny made; she warned me of the very last song on the disc, that it always makes her mom cry, and that I might too. As soon as I heard it tears were in my eyes. I have listened to it many times before but only this time did I sob. This time I heard my almost four year old singing the words. And oh, did my heart melt.

If you aren't familiar with Ta.ylor S.wift, get onto itunes and listen to this one stat. It won't disappoint (she also has a few others that are similar and really hit home). Here are just a few lines from "Never Grow Up":

"Your little hands wrapped around my finger

And it's so quiet in the world tonight

Your little eyelids flutter 'cause you're dreaming

So I tuck you in, turn on your favorite night light

To you, everything's funny

You got nothing to regret

I'd give all I have, honey

If you could stay like that

Oh, darling, don't you ever grow up, don't you ever grow up

Just stay this little

Oh, darling, don't you ever grow up, don't you ever grow up

It could stay this simple

I won't let nobody hurt you

Won't let no one break your heart

No, no one will desert you

Just try to never grow up, never grow up"

To hear this song being sung by Iz...my heartstrings were tugged so strong, it felt like my heart was beating outside of my chest. Let's just say I hugged the girls tighter and read them 4 books (instead of the usual 2) that night in bed. Snuggled them a little extra and gave more smooches than they wanted.

 

We still have a good 3 weeks with the nanny until our summer is officially over and you better believe we're soaking it all up. And still hoping they never grow up :) A mom can dream, right? In the meantime, here are a few pictures of Laney in the backyard...

 

Here's to time slowing down...and living in the moment with my girls.